Today Noah had a half-day at school, so this afternoon we went shopping for a classmates birthday present, wrapped the gift with a paper bag and decorated it, then we dipped pretzel sticks into melted chocolate and covered them with sprinkles. FUN!! Right?? ummmm ... it could have been if I were more patient. Instead, I was very impatient, rude, and sucked the fun right out of it!
On the way to the store things were good. Noah told me he promised his friend a tractor-trailer movie for his birthday. I told Noah we probably won't be able to find one, and we'll just buy something else that looks fun. Can I pick it out? asked Noah. Yes, you can help me pick it out. Noah was excited. He picked out one thing after another, just for me to tell him NO. Then, still cheerful, he said, Mom, we can just buy what you want to buy. I felt a twinge of guilt. I asked Noah for his opinion. So we decided together. Whew, that went okay. I'm starting to feel crabby. Probably because there are a bunch of things in the store I would have liked to purchase for myself and the house.
Then we go home, I put Bella down for a nap, and begin to wrap the gift. Noah finds his markers, stickers, and glitter glue to decorate. I take forever to wrap this gift... had some trouble because of its odd shape. Noah opens the glitter glue, and asks why isn't it coming out. I look over, and it IS coming out, big globs of it. I blow up... I had asked him to wait till I was done wrapping so I could cover the table and help him. I didn't want this glitter glue all over the house. He apologizes... Sorry Mom,... are you angry at me? OHHH another twinge of guilt. I asked myself why I was being such a crab, it is washable after all. Noah was unflappable today. Very unlike him, it should have been a great day. He waits somewhat patiently without waking Bella while I continue to wrap. Then he happily decorates... again, very unlike him.
Next I ask if he wants to make a treat with me. He hesitates, but I lure him with talk of melted chocolate and sprinkles. He asks if we can give some to his friend for the party. Sure we can. We dump the sprinkles in a bowl, and begin melting chocolate. Next I dip the pretzel in chocolate, then Noah spoons sprinkles over it while I twirl the pretzel stick. Things are going great, except a few sprinkles are falling to floor, and he is moving too slow for me. I remind myself his is only 4, be patient... be patient, breathe and be patient. All to no avail. After pretzel number 4 or 5, I sharply point out that sprinkles are falling to the floor. I know he says, this sure is hard work! We keep going, then I let out a big sign. Noah looks at me and asks, why did you do that? Growing more impatient by the second, chocolate is dripping all over floor. He puts down his spoon, and asks if he can do something else. This is not so much fun, he says...another twinge of guilt, this time a big one. It is all because I am losing it. I felt awful again. Noah told me he is going to take a break from me. OUCH!!! This is what I tell him when he throws tantrums and I ask him to stay in his room until he has calmed down.
After that, I got it together a bit, and we enjoyed our time together. He was still in a surprisingly good mood, despite the fact that I had sucked the fun out of the entire afternoon! I can't wait for this rain to stop... so we can finally enjoy the outdoors again. Noah is too active to have in the house all day.
Fruits of our labor...Noah can't wait to surprise his friend tomorrow at the party.
5 comments:
Oh Eva we have all done it, sucked the fun out, Joey is pretty good at doing it. The best is when they are fast asleep and you can smile when you see their little sweet faces. Tomorrow is a new day and you can start all over.
I love the pretzels by the way great job guys! I made some for Olivia's Halloween party last year. Yummy!
Eva, your post got me feeling bad for Noah. He's not the only one feeling that way about a grouchy mama on occasion. My children are also innocent victims. It just makes me realize how real our childrens' feelings are. Sometimes I forget that they are people too...with feelings. Not only mama. I'm going to have try making those pretzel sticks. Looks like a great treat!!
First, I like the new layout. It's pretty! Second, even though Oliver is only 7 months old, I still get to feeling pretty impatient with him sometimes, mostly because he's pretty needy. I just wanted to offer hugs and the encouragement that you're not alone, you're still a wonderful, caring mother...and I'm sure Noah still loves you, because you're his Mommy!
You poor mama's!! Stop being so hard on yourselves! You are only human... like the rest of us.
Your children are SOOOOO lucky to have you, to do interesting things with them and give them the gifts of sharing the joys of the world with them everyday. Being impatient and annoyed are everyday emotions which adults treat each other to every day! I can't tell you how often in my day I'm annoyed with an instructor who isn't teaching it the way that I would have, or with a project partner who's too slow (or fast) with certain tasks. It's good to expose Noah to these true emotions because he'll experience them his entire life and will need to know how to react to, at times, unpleasant situations.
You all are all wonderful mothers!
Yes!! I totally agree with Fatima! Isn't it great that Noah does love you, Eva -- no matter what! And what a wonderful gift that he is learning to still enjoy himself even though his mom might be a bit crabby. And, wow! For him to say he's going to take a break from you -- that is such a skill needed in life, to be able to calmly step away from a heated situation and to just let the other person be. It looks like you and Noah are a good team -- learning from eachother.
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